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Sunday, May 30, 2010

My Husband is a big fat cry baby!

First things first.  My Daughters presentation was excruciatingly LONG!  After each kid went up they had a chance to ask questions to the presenter.  I swear if these kids were paying attention they would have answered the question.  "where did you grow up"? "how old were you when you died"? "how many brothers and sisters did you have"?  OMG!  Shut up and MOVE ON.  2 full hours of this and of course my Daughter went LAST!  I was starving and could hear my stomach rumbling while the kids were talking.  A couple of the kids I couldn't even understand......put these kids in speech class for Christ sakes, it was like listening to someone talking with their mouths full.  She did really well though and I am proud of her.  She was the only kid that actually memorized her speech.

Went to the lake yesterday.  It was nice, ran the boat around a little bit.  I finally got some sun on my white ass.  I was super tired when we got home yesterday and fell asleep at 8.  And I did get to sleep in this morning which was a bonus.

Went to the movies with my mom this afternoon.  Saw Sex and the City.  It was not bad, but would have been a better rental.  Then my mom invited us to a bbq at her house tonight and that's when all hell broke loose.  My IDIOT Husband needs a reality check.  We started getting ready about 15 minutes before 5 (The time we were suppose to be there)  When the step kid aka dickhead decides he want to go camping with his friends.  It's fucking 5 you couldn't have decided this like this afternoon?  So I helped my Husband aka cry baby get out the tent and a few things out for him so we could leave but then dickhead shows up, so it's 20 minutes waiting in the car for him to go.  Cry baby gives him the bbq (keep in mind this kid breaks everything he touches) so I don't expect that to work next week when we try to use it while we are camping.  Then the kid sees the beer bong in the trailer and says oh can we have that?  And he actually gave it to him.....16 years old.  Finally we were on our way to my moms and I'm like I cant believe you actually did that....so the fight erupts.  I basically called him a bad dad and he got bent (well that's kind of bullshit and not being a responsible parent, I mean do it behind your parents back like the rest of us) got all pissed dropped me off and my son is like Daddy where are you going I'm all daddy's a crybaby and he's going home.  He responds with a fuck you and I say fuck you to go cry at home BIATCH, then went in side.  Asshole I had more fun without him.  So now 3 hours later I come home get ready to go watch some TV in the bedroom cause I'm still pissed and that fucker sees what I'm doing and go's back there and steals the TV......Whatever now I can blog about you and your whinny ass, when I was going to have to wait until tomorrow.  Thank god he's working tomorrow cause I don't think I could stand being home all day with him.  Hopefully he'll be over it before he comes home.

Friday, May 28, 2010

To Meat or not to Meat that is the question

I am off to a girls night out tonight with my friend.  I asked her where do you want to go, she's like I don't care.  I want MEAT.  OK so here is the story.  My Husband is a diabetic and decided to stop eating red meat.  Which means so did the whole house.  I, however eat it when I am alone....yes he doesn't know, I hide my hamburger obsession, and eat it in secret like a bulimic binging in the closet.  There is only so much chicken I can stand before it puts me in a mood.  So my vote is MEAT oh sweet lovely MEAT.

I realized 2 things this morning while i have been lounging around in my jammies.  1.  I REALLY need to dye my hair.  The grays are showing like mad.  I hate getting older, having to buy hair dye, eye cream, and really hair growing where it shouldn't be....come on  WTF? Like I don't have enough problems now I gotta start waxing too!  2.  Give and old lady a AAA book with no Internet access trying to plan a vacation equals me having to look up a thousand hotels for my Grandma....on my day off.....and apparently my computer screen is not big enough for her to read because she was practically in my lap, nosed pressed to the screen trying to read the google map.  So after an hour of looking up the prices for every hotel, motel in the greater downtown Sacramento area, she decided she had enough for a price comparison and took off.

My daughters Annie Oakley presentation is today around 12:30.......yay.......cant wait to sit through 2 hours of the entire 3rd grade presenting their speeches.  What fun!  I am sure I will have a report about that little HELL later tonight, so stay tuned folks.

Now it's off to watch my trashy reality shows that I have been recording over the last 2 weeks, before the 3rd grade nightmare begins.

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Finally back to my morning coffee.

The Hubby finally went to work today......Praise the lord.  I had my nice quiet time watching the news and having my coffee.  I am in such a better mood this morning.

Tonight is the night my Husband coaches my sons baseball team.  This ought to be interesting.  The day is shitty, cloudy and sprinkles, and I'm wondering how do I get a hold of the rest of the team if it's raining and it gets called off. 

Finally got my ass back to the gym last night, after being lazy on Tuesday.  I felt better after my workout, and nothing beats being 4 sizes smaller.   Sometimes when the house is chaos I look forward to dumping the screaming children on my Husband.  HAHA you bastard, serves you right for dumping your evil kids on me while you went to the bar after work every Wednesday a few years back.  Payback is a bitch isn't it!

So the great camping debate is still going on in my household.  Should we go tomorrow night or not.  I finally said forget it, we will just go next weekend, his argument is all our friends cant go next weekend and we will be camping alone.  Who cares it will be nice and drama free.  We usually camp with a big group in the beginning of the year and then he gets all pissed and says we are never camping with them again because of all the crap that usually happens.  The weather will be nicer next weekend anyways.  I told him I think we need to get new friends, cause the ones we have that we camp with arnt working out.

And hey on a funny note our state has made national news due to another crackpot politition.  "Chicken suites banned from Nevada polls".  Yes folks thats the way we roll here in bumfuck Nevada!  Cluck Cluck!

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Another WTF?

Question:  How many police cars does it take to pull over a little old lady wearing a flowered hat?

Answer:  Appearently it's three!

I was on my way home for lunch today and spotted the back of a patrol car at the end of my street.  I know I don't live in the best neighborhood, there is a laundromat and self storage at the end of my street.  Hey it's all I could afford.  So Just as I was about to turn the corner I thought to myself hhhhmmmmm whats going on?  Drug Bust?  Drunk Driver?  Fight at the laundromat?  Nope, one little old lady in a wicker flowered hat surrounded by 5 police men.  I looked....OK, starred and thought what could this lady have done to need this many cops?  I saw no ran over children near by, no ambulance?  As I made my way down the street to my house. I said to myself aaaahhhh my hard earned tax dollars at work interrogating the little old lady in the flowered hat....GEEE I feel so much safer now that that cow is off the road.  Give me a break!

Well My Husband has decided not to go to work AGAIN today because his back still hurts.  Instead he decides to go shopping....at the grocery store.....while losing 2 days worth of pay because he is hurt.  He spent $105.00 on beer, a birthday card for his dad, hamburger buns and sunscreen.  Yes this is why we DO NOT let our men go shopping, but he managed to get a $6.00 rebate on the thirty pack of beer he purchased WOOOO  HOOOOO.  On the upside I did have lunch made for me when I got home, aside from that he is REALLY fucking up my lunchtime routine.  First make a sandwich, second turn on the soap opera, third head to the computer and play my facebook games while eating a sandwich and watching TV all at the same time.  I have it down to a science.  So got my sandwich....check.....got the TV on AMC....check.....facebook.....check.......husband sitting down next to me blocking the TV whining about me on the computer to much.....check......then has the gall to ask for a lunchtime quickie????  HAHA....I DON'T THINK SO pal!  Move your ass over your blocking my view.  If he can have sex then he can go to work! Until then NADA!

WTF????


Bird poo used for beauty face mask


While millions of women are snapping up age-defying skin creams, the latest miracle cure for a sagging face has just arrived – nightingale poo.

This is one of the headlines on MSN I was reading this morning in their top 5's
 
I think we have crossed a line here people, NO WAY in HELL!!

Another Day!

I did not wake up in a good mood today at all. Mainly because today was the day I was suppose to be off the rest of the week and I’m stuck here at work. Oh well next weekend it is, 80 degrees and lots of sunshine. I think it’s what I need to get me out of this funk I’m in. I blew off the gym last night simply because I really wasn’t in the mood, and put on my jammies and watched some of my shows I had recorded. I am a reality show junkie, and have sucked my Husband into my evil ways :) haha. I love my Husband most of the time, and I know he means well but FUCK, this morning when I HAD to get up 10 minutes late of course, he’s like lets cuddle, I’m like get off me. I just want to lay here with my coffee, watch the news and not have to talk, so SHUT THE HELL UP! I really hate when he doesn't go to work, it totally screws up my morning routine.

Last night I get home and this is like 2 days in a row this has happened so now I’m irritated, I took out chicken for dinner, getting ready to cook it after I relax for like 10 minutes from just walking into the house when the Step-bastard comes home and is like when’s dinner? I’m hungry, I’m making a sandwich. Then after his sandwich, like half an hour later dinner was ready and he eats that too. WHAT THE FUCK? Do I look like a restaurant here? Could we possibly eat more food then necessary......Please go ahead eat your sandwich so there's NO bread tomorrow when I need to eat lunch, or lunch meat, or cheese because your FAT ASS cant wait half an hour for dinner. I hope you chock on that chicken you ASS FACE.
 
I really hope the rest of the day goes better then my morning has so far.  (sigh)

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

My Husband is OLD!

I got home yesterday to find my Husband laying on the couch half asleep. I figured he still had a headache, which was reported to me in a phone call earlier in the day. Come to find out he hurt his back yesterday. HHHMMMM, well that's what you get for being an out of shape 40 year old trying to do construction. This is not going to be good for me as I quickly found out last night. I, being the saintly wife that I am, massaged tiger balm on his back for him, placed a bag of frozen broccoli on the spot that he hurt, moved it up and down on his back for half an hour cause the bag of broccoli wasn't big enough, got out the heating pad and put it under him, then got out of bed to get him a towel to go over the heating pad cause it was "To Scratchy on his poor wittle back". Then listened to him moan and groan all night turning over and getting up to go to the bathroom. Geez what is it with guys when they get older? He pees like 10 times a night? So he obviously didn't go to work today......yay cant wait to go home so I can wait on him hand and foot for my entire lunch hour.

The baseball game wasn't that bad last night, it was cold, but, the sun was out so it made it a little more enjoyable. Crackhead team mom showed up last night (shocking) it must have been her night off from working the stripper pole. My husband (hehehe) got suckered into coaching the team on Thursday night, because the coaches decided to take off and go camping for the weekend. So he worked his magic and got 3 of the other dads to help him out. I really hope his back is better by then, or you no who is going to have to help fill in. Actually he told me since he has to coach I have to work the dugout again......lets see if I can take another swing to the ribs this time. My son is super excited his dad will be the coach though, and it's kind of cool for him.

So we decided to take our boat out on Sunday since our camping trip fell apart. It's suppose to be 76 degrees. WOW, it's like a friggin heat wave out there. It will be nice to get out of the house, and get a little sun for the day. I was getting a nice tan going from the few nice weekends we had earlier in the month but it's fading back to blinding white. Hopefully the step monster will stay home so I can enjoy my day.

Monday, May 24, 2010

Depressed

If it snows one more time I'm MOVING! I was suppose to be on vacation this week, but due to the schizophrenic weather around here, it's not happening. Yes working all week is what I was looking most forward too. The boss is back, cant be f-ing around all week like last week. Bipolar minion started first thing this morning about how she was here till 5:35 last Friday.....aaaauuuuuhhhh, wwwwhhhhaaaa, I left early bitch haha. Sucks to be you!

I am off on Friday so I can attend yet another riveting event of my daughters. A presentation on Annie Oakley. I was hoping I would be camping and unfortunately have to miss the show.....DAMN WEATHER, Fucked Again! I wrote the whole damn thing for her, OK sometimes it's just easier to do it yourself and move on. Shes in the 3rd grade, I really don't think she needs to be writing AND memorizing 5 paragraphs about some dead bitch whose name will never again pass through the lips of that kid. NOBODY CARES! Why don't you teachers get your heads out of your ass, it's the end of the year 2 more weeks of school. If they honestly believe that the kids are writing this shit, they are crazy. Take for instance the project on Italy she had to do, Who ended up writing and looking up all the facts, drawing the map (the only thing she did was color it) and having to make spaghetti for her class. ALL ME! And the Science fair....don't even get me started on that. The Project...all me, she did get a good grade though. Cant we go back to the days when elementary school was about learning to read, and write add, and subtract, crafts on Fridays and Movie days. Like when I was a kid. No apparently elementary school is the new high school, So I can assume Jr. High is the new college and High School is the new graduate school. WTF?

So a little note on last weekends dance show I forgot to mention. One quick question! When did little girls stop learning how to do cartwheels? I swear all ages ranging from 6-17ish could not do a cartwheel??? WTF? Thats all I did as a kid....cartwheels everywhere, up until I was like 18. I'm sure I could probably pull one off now but the thought of me pulling some muscule I didnt no existed keeps me from trying. I blame the damn school district....to much leaning and not enough cartwheels! Fuck I should run for something huh. That will be my motto! ;)

So another dreadful baseball game tonight (sigh). I'm ready to go freeze my ass off for the umpteenth time this week. And on top of it all my lovely daughter still seems to be in full PMS mode, and is already complaining about having to go. YAY me I love my life!

Sunday, May 23, 2010

Snow in may

Snow in May sucks. It killed my vegetables, oh well i guess I will go to Lowes and just buy some plants. To late to start them from seed again.

The baseball game ended early. Thank god it was freezing and that was an understatement. Crackhead didn't show up so I had to help in the dugout. I really just wanted to sit in my chair under my blanket and watch, but I did my good deed for the week and helped. I don't know any of these kids names except the ones I don't like, so it was HEY YOU, put on your helmet and get a bat. Then stupid me walked right in front of a kid swinging his bat and took one to the ribs. OOOWWWW, thank god the little bastards don't swing that hard, or he could have done some serious damage.

The hair nightmare has ended. The only way to get her hair to curl is A LOT of hairspray and hot rollers. It did come out really cute with minimal bitchage. Her show was nice. She did way better than rehearsal. I cant say that for all of them though......some of the girls were lets just say kudos for them for getting up there and trying. Then the one poor drama, (oh you could just tell he took drama) geeks was singing a song, the CD kept skipping half way through it, it was sad but funny he started over like 4 time finally just gave up. All and all it was cute, but thank god these kids don't try to do any kind of competition.

Getting the trailer ready for camping yesterday, but still don't know if we are going. I'm sure it will come down to the last minute as usual. At this rate I really don't care about the weather I just want to get out of town and sit my ass in a chair for the next 4 days doing NOTHING.

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Ready to Freeze my ASS OFF!

My sons game is this morning and it's like 35 degrees out. It's May for gods sake it should be at least 65 out. Hell I would settle for 55.

My idiot brother decided to have a garage sale today???? Today....really, hey good luck with that buddy.

I didn't cover all the stuff I just planted in my garden last night....that was a bad idea, most of it's wilting. I really hope it comes back, but seeing as how it did snow, yes I said SNOW last night I think I'm pretty much screwed. Once again it is MAY.

The hair nightmare begins at 3:00 today. Lets see if I can get my Daughters hair to hold a curl for her show. I am going in with a game plan. Lots of hairspray, gel, and whatever else I can find to put in it. I am trying hot rollers this time. Lets see how much she bitches about this?

OK well off to the shower to get ready for the baseball freeze! Global warming where art thou.

Friday, May 21, 2010

Cluster FUCK

So that is 2 hours i will never get back from my life......and I really want it back!
Went to my Daughters dance rehearsal, what a nightmare. Really un organized, basiclly we got there she did her thing which EVERYONE needed about another MONTH of practice, and then proceeded to sit there for the next 2 hours watching kids I dont care about fuck up their routines. I finally couldnt take it anymore and left. And she only got through the morning program, ours is at night. If your gonna put on a show and actually charge people to see it, then make damn sure these kids know the routine. But what do I know. Appearently NOTHING! Oh and there is this REALLY irratating kid clapping as loud as he could in the most inappropriate times during their practice, really made me want to smack him. And getting my daughter to actually sit the hell down was another chore. I actually had a hanger in my hand that her tutu was on telling her to sit down, and all I could think of was dont make me go all mommy dearest on your ass SIT DOWN......NO MORE WIRE HANGERS!!!!! HAHAHA. Well hoepfully tomorrow they will have their shit together, we shall see! Oh and sorry for the mis spellings my spell checker isnt working.....POS!

Does he think I'm his personal secretary?

I suppose this is where it comes back to bite me in the ass! Speaking of the little shenanigan I pulled on my Husband last night so I didn't have to cook. I forgot...well it wasn't actually my fault.....he shouldn't try and tell me things to do 2 seconds after i wake up in the morning. I was suppose to cancel his doctor appointment, and call to re-fill his prescription. I forgot....geez sorry ass. So he calls me, from HOME no less to see if I did it. I am working (sort of) and your home, off work, playing on the computer, and I have to still call to cancel your appointment and refill your prescription....SERIOUSLY?

Half hour to go.....Fan-fucking-tastic, cant wait to get my PMSing daughter to her dress reheasal and sit through that tonight. I am SOOOO not in the mood. Fingers Crossed she doesnt actually SUCK. (I still love her even though I talk mad shit)

On a lighter note I did have a fantasic lunch today. Went to my favorite place and even treated myself to dessert. Berry lemon cream cake YYYUUUUMMMM.

Well off to dance hell hope the rest of the weekend doesnt SUCK!

It's like the wizard of oz out there!

The weather is CRAP today! Which makes me more in a bad mood. Actually my day started off pretty ok, until I had to do my daughters hair. I went to my grandmas to pick her up for school cause she stayed the night last night and of course dress rehearsal is also tonight so I had to go put it up so my grandma can curl it when she gets home from school. I am half tempted at the moment just to shave her head and save us both the argument. Anyways after bushing it with the bush that made it staticy, I used the comb to wet it down and put it up. oooowwwww.....oooowwww....stop.....your hurting me, set me off. Have you ever wanted to beat you daughter with a brush? The thought has crossed my mind more than once. Her idea of doing her hair is throwing a headband in without brushing it and off to school. NNNOOOO not in my house your not. So long story short hair got done went out to the car to leave for school and she tries to rip the door handle off because the car is locked. WTF is wrong with that girl, I think I need to beat her....(although I wouldn't), But I want to. AAAAHHH she drives me nuts. I just cant wait till she starts her period that ought to be a blast. I'm sending her to live with her dad.

On to a minion update. Ok I finally came up with minion 1's name. After this morning it sealed the deal. She will now be known as bipolar minion! Bipolar minion started off first thing this morning. I'm here but I'm not here she says to me......HUH what the fuck does that mean? Here is my definition: I am a little early so I am here but not....get it? Now her definition: I don't feel good, my ears are clogged and I'm dizzy, so I'm here but I'm not. Well I guess I can count on you calling in sick for the next week. Good thing you worked that 1/2 hour of overtime that you bitched about yesterday for when you paycheck gets docked AGAIN. Now on to menopausal minion, so far I only got a huffy good morning and that was more like I'm here and I'm having one of my.....I'll just refer to it as one of her spells. I was half tempted to ask her if she forgot her hormone pills this morning but I really didn't feel like getting my head ripped off and pea soup thrown up on me.

On a good note I tricked my Husband into getting me dinner last night so I didnt have to cook.......aaaahhhh, I figure I can get him to do just about anything if I offer him sex. Maybe I CAN get that trailer toilet cleaned after all :) And the good thing about this little trick is if I wait long enough, he will be to tired to collect. I do know however this will in fact blow the fuck up in my face one day soon, but till then I'm riding the gravy train till the funs over!

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Incomming..... Stressful Weekend.

Well, although it was windy as crap last night, the baseball game went pretty well. The kids really didn't seem into it last night, I don't know if it was to cold from the wind or if they were just done.....who knows. I did however have a lovely conversation with our team mom.....AKA crackhead, yes it's true...no joke. Seeing her running around like a chicken with her head cut off is hilarious. And just to get the pictures and pass them out to the team was entertaining and the cards she got of her son had his birthday year as 2013 hahahaha (yeah like that was really the photographers fault, we all know that your to skittish, and probably fucked up the form). I especially loved it last Saturday when she showed up in booty shorts, ass hanging out every time she bent over.....priceless. I must admit it was hot out, but man nobody wants to see your skinny drugged out ass hanging out of your shorts, thank god your kid is only 6 and isn't embarrassed by his mom YET. So aside from the conversation and watching her chase after her I'm guessing 1-2 year old girl who I mainly was waiting for her to fall out of the stroller because; A. mom wasn't watching (shocking) and; B. she was standing up in it, the wind was blowing and once again mom wasn't watching, and; C. running off cause mom wasn't watching because she had to take a smoke break. P.S. Dad was there and SHOCKINGLY NOT WATCHING. I love being on the white trash team it's great!

I did manage to get my Daughters hair kind of curled....it is so straight it wont do a damn thing....her explanation for that was it's because of, and I quote, "my natural curl" WHAT???? REALLY????? I'm serious she really gets that from her idiot dad...God what was I thinking???? I'll tell you what I was thinking, and it wasn't with my head! Good thing I finally, (yes mom I know I told you so) came to my senses. Lesson learned....well not really cause my Husband now has his own issues.

So off to dress rehearsal tomorrow night......yay.....cant wait....I hope you got the hint of sarcasm. Then more baseball Saturday morning, and the regular show that night. Oh and in between all that I have to clean my trailer for camping (fingers crossed on the weather) next weekend. When my Husband took it to Vegas a couple months ago with 6 guys eeewww imagine the toilet, he was instructed that he needed to clean it. PPPPFFFTTT! Yeah, did I really think that was going to happen? I would have a better chance of shitting purple twinkies than him cleaning the trailer. Oh well a wife's job is never done.

Minion 1 came in this morning already bitching......haven't seen minion 2 yet but I suspect she will be in one of her usual menopausal mood swings. For a while there we were actually taking bets (me and minion 1) on what her mood was based on the look on her face when she got out of the car. It was either stay in the office or scatter like rats. Come on she just got back from vacation she should be in a good mood, not this one, the vacation only seems to make her in more of a bad mood. Note to self: Deny any vacation requests from minion 2.....scratch that, she will now be known as menopausal minion. I'm still trying to come up with a clever name for minion 1. So Minion 1 was complaining that she had to stay over a 1/2 hour last night to help menopausal minion copy a bunch of stuff for certified letters. Stop complaining it's extra money and god knows you need it due to the fact that your loser boyfriend AKA fiance' (it's been like 10 years get married or leave him already) hasnt had a job in like a year and you still live with your parents. Stock it up for when you call in sick and your paycheck gets docked because; A. you have used all your sick time, Vacation and family time, and; B. Nobody could possibly be that sick in one year unless they are dying. Good thing you work here cause anywhere else would have fired you ass. And; C. I am sick of hearing that your paycheck got docked and you cant do your job cause you have no money and unemployed leach hasnt got his unemployment check yet. Which is not saying a lot about the company I work for, but I really do like most of the people, and some can SUCK IT!

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Why did I bother comming to work today?

Well, I have been here at work for the past 3 hours now. The boss is gone this week so you know what that means....do as little as possible. I have spent the last 3 hours checking out other blogs on this site, since I am new and wanted to get a grasp on what the bloggers of the world were up to. CONCLUSION: There is some crazy shit out there, most of it was your average hey look at all the cute pictures of my family stuff. A lot was stuff I couldn't even read due to the fact I only speak one language. And the other.....hhhhmmmm wow no words. But I guess there's something out there for everyone.

So I started the fourth book in the undead series, so far so good. Its a great read for when I'm sitting in my car, on break, chain smoking, so I can get through the rest of my day hopefully without having to hear the girls that work for me, which I am now referring to as my minions complain about each other....I swear one day I'm gonna have to break up a cat fight between those two. It's like I come to work to get away from my kids, and have to babysit here too. They are grown women for gods sake get a fucking grip, do your job and shut up. If I have to hear minion 1 complain about how she doesn't feel good for the 10th time this week I'm going to drive myself over a cliff.

OK, so now that that's out of my system. My sons baseball game is tonight.....aaaahhhh an evening watching a bunch of 5 and 6 year olds picking dandelions, doing summer salts, and beating the shit out of home plate with the bat when their up......seriously comical. Last week my son forgot to stop at 3rd base and ran to home plate which of course we were sitting right there. We yelled at him to go back then he realized what he had done quickly says "I just wanted to say I love ya" and ran back to 3rd. Quick thinking on his part....he gets that from me! :)

So prior to my sons game tonight my Daughter also has pictures for her upcoming dance recital....tonight, same time as my sons game, I'm telling you if you have more than 1 kid dont put them in a variety of things, there is always a schedule conflict. So my Grandma has graciously volunteered to take her thank god, but her hair still needs to be done. OK I get off at 4:30 pick both the kids up at 2 different places, make it home by 10 to 5, I must curl her hair in the 5 minutes that I have before shes picked up.....it takes at least 10 minutes for the stupid curling iron to heat up. Oh great now her hair is going to look like crap. The dance studio moved the time up by half an hour due to a parents conflict. OK REALLY? What about the rest of us parents? Why don't you change your schedule so it doesn't fuck up the rest of us.....JERK! I hate people. So in addition to tonight's pictures, Friday is dress rehearsal....yay, fine way to screw up my Friday night thanks bitches. Which I have to go to because they will not let you take pictures on Saturday night the actual day of the recital....nnnooooo you can only do it Friday night. So having to sit through this twice is going to be a joy and the fact that I actually had to pay for the show on Saturday along with previewing it on Friday.....lets just say I'm sure once will be enough. I am proud of my daughter and love her very much but that girl CAN NOT dance, no rhythm, no grace, it's like watching a train wreck. But it keeps her busy and she likes it and I will keep lying to her face telling her how good she is cause that's what moms do.

Oh and on top of it all, I have to fit dinner in there somewhere??? And hopefully the evil step monster will be staying at his moms tonight. Thats a whole nother story for another time, lets just say this, 16 year old with pants that hang around his ass has been the thorn in my side for many years.

First post ever!!!

OK, so I woke up in a pretty good mood this morning. This is not typical of me. All seems right in the world today considering I didn't have to yell at the kids 500 times to get dressed, which is the norm in my house. Everyone ate breakfast...still no fighting, car ride to school unusually quiet....WTF? Has hell frozen over? OK I'm just taking it for what it is, a good day few and far between. Lets just hope the rest of the day goes as well.

So last night I put the kids in the shower, aaaahhh 10 whole minutes of no mom change the channel, mom i need a drink, mom can I have dessert, mom come wipe my butt. Shear bliss, when my daughter comes running out in her towel barley hanging on and says I lost my tooth. OK good....thank god I have two bucks in my wallet for the tooth fairy tonight. I say well go put it in your room so it doesn't get lost. On her way down the hall, she runs into my son who is 6, she is 9 by the way, anyways, she tells my son look I lost my tooth, he's like "oh, the tooth fairy is gonna come tonight" then proceeds to come into the living room and explain to my Husband and myself that her just saw his sister nuts! After a brief 5 minutes of laughing I tried to explain to him that girls dont have nuts. They have girl parts, and boys have nuts. He's like nnnnoooo then how does she pee.....REALLY? I am REALLY having to explain this, my Husband barley able to control himself is not being any help and basiclly just egging him on by laughing. I finally said forget it and agreed with him just to get him to drop it. Gotta love the shit that comes out of the mouth of kids.