Happy Birthday to me!

Tomorrow is my birthday and I thought I would write a special little what I am thankful for post.  I realize this is suppose to be done around Thanksgiving, but I am not one to go with the grain of society.  So here goes:

I will be 37 tomorrow.  Most women my age are freaking out over the fact that in a few years it’s going to be the big 40.  I look at it like hey isn't 40 suppose to be like the new 20 or something?  If that’s the case I am reliving my teen years at the moment.  HAHA!  I would kill myself if I had to relive that nightmare.  I am happy to say that I look forward to it.  I cant in good conscience say that I wish to ever be 20 again.  Sure I would love to look 20 again, but actually be in my 20's, no thanks.  I can honestly say that my thirties, although may have started off a little bumpy, have really turned into the best time in my life so far.  I am so content at the moment. Dare I say could it be any better?  Of course it could, but right now I am thankful for what it is.

My kids, although I am the proud owner of a hormonal 14 year old girl, (and that in it self is usually a full time job) are pretty good kids.  I have to be thankful that my daughter isn't a raving slut like I turned into at her age.  She has her moments of attitude, but is still a pretty good kid.  My son, is like a 75 year old living in an 11 year olds body.  The minute he walks through the door from school it’s drop your pants and relax the rest of the day.  I actually heard the words “whipper snapper” come out of his mouth last week.  Oh and don’t ask him to go out to dinner or just go out in general because he would rather be home lounging in his boxers.  Now shopping is a different story.  That’s the only time I can bribe him to come out with us.  That kid though is smart as a whip.  I expect him to have a high paying job so I can live out my years in a nice upscale old folks home.

I must give thanks to my ex and his wife who was the chick he cheated on me with 13 years ago, because if it wasn't for her and her “golden pussy” I wouldn't be married to the great guy that I am now.  You did me a favor by seeing that greener grass, and for that I thank you.  Also, thank you Karma, because that grass is dried up and brown, and that “golden pussy” was really only gold plated and the paint is now peeling.  Karma, you really are a bitch!

Finally, I am thankful for my husband for always telling me the truth, even though its not always what I want to hear.  For having the most fun together, watching chick flicks with me, going to bed at 9 even on the weekends and not caring if that makes us old, binge watching Netflix with me, living next door to my mom and near most of my relatives, not making me have much to do much with your mom, and finally being a good dad to my daughter cause her dad is an ass and our son.  I look forward to being an old fart traveling the country in our RV during the golden years.

In closing, I look forward to another great year.  Hello 37!

To Meat or not to Meat that is the question

I am off to a girls night out tonight with my friend.  I asked her where do you want to go, she's like I don't care.  I want MEAT.  OK so here is the story.  My Husband is a diabetic and decided to stop eating red meat.  Which means so did the whole house.  I, however eat it when I am alone....yes he doesn't know, I hide my hamburger obsession, and eat it in secret like a bulimic binging in the closet.  There is only so much chicken I can stand before it puts me in a mood.  So my vote is MEAT oh sweet lovely MEAT.

I realized 2 things this morning while i have been lounging around in my jammies.  1.  I REALLY need to dye my hair.  The grays are showing like mad.  I hate getting older, having to buy hair dye, eye cream, and really hair growing where it shouldn't be....come on  WTF? Like I don't have enough problems now I gotta start waxing too!  2.  Give and old lady a AAA book with no Internet access trying to plan a vacation equals me having to look up a thousand hotels for my Grandma....on my day off.....and apparently my computer screen is not big enough for her to read because she was practically in my lap, nosed pressed to the screen trying to read the google map.  So after an hour of looking up the prices for every hotel, motel in the greater downtown Sacramento area, she decided she had enough for a price comparison and took off.

My daughters Annie Oakley presentation is today around 12:30.......yay.......cant wait to sit through 2 hours of the entire 3rd grade presenting their speeches.  What fun!  I am sure I will have a report about that little HELL later tonight, so stay tuned folks.

Now it's off to watch my trashy reality shows that I have been recording over the last 2 weeks, before the 3rd grade nightmare begins.