Friday, July 30, 2010

Just when I didnt think he couldn't get any stupider!

He did!  I had a fun filled evening of eaves dropping on the Hubby yelling at the step bastard in the driveway.  I was watching TV in my bedroom because the boy took over the living room TV with I Carly when I heard the Hubby pull up.  He was out talking to god knows who on the sidewalk when I heard him say Oh! Here comes the step bastard, I need to yell at him too.  HHHMMMM, what could this be about????  So he pulls up and the yelling commences.  The boy decides to come in at that very moment trying to show me something and I was like ssshhhh, be quiet mommy's trying to hear.  He's like hear what?  I said daddy yelling.  He's like oh, and continues to babble on.  Crap, be quiet and go watch TV I said.  He stomped off.  So here I am in the corner of my bathroom which luckily faces the driveway, sitting on the little stool the boy uses to reach the sink, with the light off, hand cupped around my ear for better hearing trying to figure out what he did now.  Here's what happened,  The bastard works for my hubby's step dad at his shop.  He didn't feel like going into work yesterday, so instead of calling in, to his boss, he text messages his 16 year old cousin that also is working there telling her he's at the hospital because he thinks he broke his foot after he crashed on his dirk bike.  So step dad calls hubby and is like is bastard OK, what happened is his foot broken?  Hubby says huh?  What are you talking about?  I don't know anything he's been at his moms house.  When I find out I'll let you know.  So he calls the bastard to find out what the hell is going on.  Turns out, he wanted to go fuck off with his friends yesterday and comes up with this big elaborate lie of why he's not at work.  Problem!  What happens when you show up tomorrow and your foot is fine?  Oh, well he didn't think of that.  What a fucking moron.  So Hubby yelling at him why didn't you just say you didn't feel well if you wanted the day off?  Uh I don't know.  Me in the bathroom hiding saying to myself, because he's a dumb shit.  Then I hear him say you need to call and tell him the truth.  He says no you call.  Then I got interrupted, the boy again so had to go deal with that, then ran back to my spot.  And I must have missed something cause now the bastard is blubbering like a big fat baby saying (I think this was a way to turn it around into guilting my hubby) so your comparing me to my brother who's a piece of shit (the one that just got out of the pokey) no the hubby says, I'm just saying that you have responsibilities and you need to handle that.  If you want some time to go mess around with your friends, you need to ask if you can start working half day's.  More blubbering, so I'm a piece of shit?  OMG! enough with the pitty party already sheesh.  At that moment hubby came into the house I darted to the bed turned on the TV and was like heeey whats going on?  Not now he said.  HAHA I already know wink wink.  So end of story hubby says man up and fix your own problem cause if you get fired I'm taking your truck away (have fun hoofing it asshole hehe)  So we shall see what happens.

Tonight it's a whole lot of celing scraping fun.  HUH, cant wait!!!!  I swear my phone batteries half dead from all the texting to my mom this morning.  Ask your hubby this, ask your hubby that.  Calm down!  It cant all get done in one day.  Focus on the current tasks and we will move on to the next.  It's going to be a long month.  Have a good weekend everyone cause I will be doing manual labor all weekend, oh what fun.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

It's going to get a little crazy around here!

I think the whole month of August is going to SUCK.  And it's still July.  First off, I am trying to mentally prepare myself for the upcoming weekend.  First on list, Moms house.  It's officially hers at 4:00 today.  We met her at Lowes yesterday so we could show my Hubby the kind of carpet she wants because we are meeting with the carpet guy tonight and I want to make sure he brings the right kind of samples for her.  We met the painter last night, which the guy barely spoke English, I think he was Filipino maybe, but damn, I'm usually not to bad about understanding certain people but I really thought he was speaking in his native language to us.  Dude, do I look Asian to you?  No, not even close.  So yesterday my Mom calls and says the realtor is emailing her the papers that she needs to sign,  and since she doesn't have a printer can she email them to me and I can print them out for her.  Sure I said, no problem.  She put my brother on the house with her (not that I am such a fuck up I cant be on there too, but seeing how the current status of my house may change in 2 years when my adjustable rate decides to fuck me in the ass I don't want to be on anybody's anything right now) So he says he cant go to the office with her to sign because he cant get off work from the DMV.  So I said have him come to my work, because it needs to be Notarized and we are all Notary's here, then I will bring it to you and you can sign in her office tomorrow.  Ha, yeah, not that easy as it may seem.  My brothers a DICK.  I called him yesterday and said how much longer is you lunch hour?  He says it just started.  I say can you swing by and sign the papers.  No, he says I'm going to lunch at my Mother in Laws (she watches his kid, and makes him lunch too?)  I said it's on the way, and it will take 5 minutes.  No, I cant it takes me to long to get to the other side of town and back.  Really it will take less then 5 minutes I say.  No, he says, I say cant you just get something for lunch today.  No, I don't have any cash.  You have a debit card don't you?  No, I'm not going to.  Fuck, fine I say and hung up, called Mom and said next time I see your son I'm going to slap him.  This pissed her off to no end.  She says I'll call you back.  Gave him some big guilt trip, and he called me and said I'll be there in 5 minutes.  HAHAHA asshole.  See aside from having the whole mom can guilt trip you into anything, we are Italian as well, so thats what the lady's are born and bred to do, use guilt to our advantage.  I have also used it to my advantage a time or two.  So papers signed......ppppfffffeeeewww.  Glad thats over and he is now on my shit list of people I hate at the DMV, actually it's safe to say I hate the whole fucking place, period.

So tomorrow night it's going to be a fun filled evening of scraping the popcorn off the ceilings.  We have a month to get everything done, this means new everything, flooring, carpet, toilets, you name it, it's on the list of to do's.  My in laws are coming next week, huh not a good time people.  So now I have to find time to clean my stupid house.  I did take Monday off to do this, because I really don't know when the hell I'm going to have any time.  The Hubby is directing me to clean all the appliances, cupboards, and doors in the kitchen, so now aside from being the smoking Nazi, he is the cleaning Nazi as well.  I am not going to complain about this to much because he is being a trooper on this whole house thing for me.  He has yet to throw a tantrum, oh wait, well he did have one, and it's regarding my brother again.  When we went to look at the house he basically did an inspection while we were there.  He is in construction, and knows what he's doing, my brother who did I mention works for the DMV?  Followed him around, up his ass trying to help.  Dude, you know nothing, just go back to your desk and produce your car titles, and stick to what you know.  So my Hubby has banned him from the house project.  He's going to be really pissed when he finds out my Mom is making him help with the ceiling scraping tomorrow night.  But I am not saying anything, I'll just let that one play out.

Next week it's camping with the in laws.  All of us, mom, and my brother (which my hubby doesn't know about yet) are going.  The in laws are bringing up their motor home, and last time we took them to the lake we camp at, they loved it.  Yep, I know, cant get that kind of camping right on the sand anywhere in CA.  So the reason my hubby didn't want Mr. DMV to come was because of his in laws.  Which I really don't mind, I like her Mom she's cool, but they tend to bring their POS boat, that smokes, and is an utter embarrassment.  That thing really needs to go, it has sawed off bar stools as seats.  He doesn't want the white trash around while his dad's up.  This, I am going to let play out as well.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Sorry it took so long!

I have been SUPER busy this weekend.  Lots to tell.  OK First we will start with Friday at the beach.  It was a fantastic day, the water was warm the air was hot, I didn't see a lot of my co-workers.  We just picked a spot close to the water so I could watch the boy and vegged out.  About 6ish we started to get some waves coming in and the boy thought that was the coolest thing ever.  Good thing we brought the boogie board.  The Hubby and I stood on the sides while the boy hung on to the board then as soon as we got a decent wave, we pushed him off and he went straight to shore.  This, he thought was the coolest thing EVER.  We had to make him get out of the water.  I think we made it home around 8 that night.

Saturday:  The day was pretty uneventful, we did hit the baseball game that night.  My hubby has been dying to try the restaurants at the ball field they just put in, so we picked a brewery type place, there is 3 places to choose from, and I took one look at the menu and was like WTF?  They listed the menu on the place mat, and the items included, 1 appetizer, 1 pizza, 1 salad, 1 of each steak, chicken and fish sliders, but 2 desserts?  It really sucked.  Out waiter needed to lay off the bong before he showed up to work.  I thought my mom was going to claw his eyes out, that's what she said anyways if she had to listen to him talk anymore.  But the Hubby ordered a beer and we were already committed.  So we ate our extremely small food, for a large price.  Next time I'm eating in the park where I know I can get lots of food for cheaper.  It was cool though my son ended up with a skateboard deck with the teams logo on it.  I figured we can hang it on his wall.  My aunt and cousin came too.  She had tickets on the other side of the stadium, but was seat jumping trying to stay close to us.  I swear, she moved like 7 times when the actual ticket holders showed up to their seats.  Kind of embarrassing.  About an hour in to the game, which wasn't packed with the exception of our area, 3 of the tallest people sat right in front of us and the boy couldn't see anything.  Fucking figures.  So I noticed a row of empty seats about 3 rows down and I figure OK an hour into the game I think we are safe lets move.  HA, of course, 20 minutes later the fuckers show up.  Serisously?  You come an hour and a half into the game?  So we just went to the outfield section and managed to not get kicked out.  My Aunt did give me a pair of Gucci sunglasses she got in Atlantic City.  I was like are these knock offs?  She said No they were over $200.00.  I was like why are you giving them to me?  She said cause I don't like them they are to big for my face.  They are the big ass ones that are in style now, that I don't wear, so I tried them on, and my Mom says they look good.  I still cant get over wearing humongous glasses.  My son says Mom, you look like a "spaquito"  Figures  oh well I just put them back for when I wanna look cool.

Sunday:  My Mom has FINALLY decided to move out of my other Aunts house.  Quick back story:  My Dad died, Mom Sold the house cause whats she going to do with a 4 bedroom house alone, and my Aunt bought a house so she could move in and not be alone and help with my cousin who at the time was 10 and going through cancer treatments.  Fast forward to 4 years later.  Cousin is cancer free in remission for 3 years now....YAY him.  My Aunt has decided she no longer wants to involve my mom (which they were super close with my parents, like going to dinner every weekend, shit like that)  in anything.  They treat her more like a room mate that is not related, then family.  So this pisses my mom off to high heaven.  Basically the only reason they were keeping her around is for the rent (they are finally filing for bankruptcy, so no longer need her money to live)  Even though I told my Mom she needs to move, and they got themselves into this hole, not your problem.  Anyways she is being sort of picky like I want this area of town, don't want to pay over this amount and this and that.  So she looked a  few in her price range, on the side of town she wanted and wasn't happy.  Everything is dated and the carpet is yuck.  So a couple of weeks ago, in the paper I see this Mobile home for like REAL cheap, in a really nice gated park that's across the street from the neighborhood she lives in.  She called on it Friday and set up an appt. to look at it.  Requested my hubby's presence, because he's in construction and can check out the house.  So we go, and my Aunt, my cousin, and my brother all show up.  We look at it, and the bones are good, but needs carpet flooring, shit like that, a fixer upper.  So my mom decided to put in an offer.  My hubby and his cronies can do all the work for her, saving her money but making it nice.  I look at it this way.  It's a blank canvas, you can put what you want in, instead of being stuck with what someone else though was great.  And besides she is getting a house for the price of a small Hyndai,  I swear it's un heard of.  Right place at the right time I guess.

Monday:  I came to work and guess what?  Bipolar called in again.  Fuck me, not today cause I slept like crap last night and really is not in the mood for this shit.  So, I ended up having to go to G'ville.  A town about 20 minutes from mine.  And on the way back, my Grandma calls and made it back home and is at Micky d's and wants to know if I want to meet her for lunch.  Sure I said I haven't seen my daughter in like 2 and a half weeks.  Not that that was a bad thing after she got home last night and made the boy cry in like 5 minutes.  So I got a call from my Mom and they accepted her offer.  YAY now the real fun begins.  Renovations, moving and my Mom's stress level through the roof, fucking fantastic.  I am super Happy for her though and think she will be happier in the long run.  But for now it's phone calls to relay messages the the hubby for her every 5 minutes.  Lets see how long it takes for him to crack.  So the girls home, I missed her till she was back for half an hour.  But in a week she's off again to Yosemite, then school starts back up.  Next week the in laws are comming to town.....MUST CLEAN HOUSE.  This should be fun dealing with that and my Mom.

Today:  Bipolar Minion showed up, isnt in the best mood and has already managed to take half of Friday off because she needs to go to the doctor for her "Migrain"  If it's that bad I would have went today and not Friday......but hey FUCKED again.

Friday, July 23, 2010

Half Day!!

Today we get a half day at work.  Our office throws a Summer party for their employee's and families.  This year we are going to the beach.  I'm just happy not to have to work all day on a Friday in 100 degree weather.  I really could find something better to do but I have to go and it could be worse I suppose, I could be working.

So last night we went to the store.  I know, I got sucked into grocery shopping once again.  But this is the reason I went.  A couple of weeks ago my sons camp went to the store on a sort of field trip.  He was telling me they went to the bakery and we watched them put something "Red in the bachine"  in know it's machine but that's how he says it, and it's cute.  So these little circles came out.  After an hour of naming off random things from the bakery dept. I could think of that would be round and red, he got all pissed and said forget it.  So the mystery continues.  I told my mom about it and she was grilling him on what this could possibly be?  We were stumped.  So my curiosity got the best of me and I decided to brave the store once more with the hubby and kid, just to find out WTF he saw.  I went straight to the bakery dept. and walked him around saying was it this?  Was it that?  no, no he says.  OK when you see it show me.  So we headed to the produce dept. and he says it's down there, towards the meat.  I already had asked if it was hamburger, cookies, frosting, doughnuts?  All to which was a NO.  So we finally get to the meat dept.  and I was standing there getting....what for it.......more CHICKEN.  and looked over and saw hamburger freshly ground in the case, plopped in a nice little circle, and said hey boy is that it?  He said YES, I was like that's hamburger, he says I didn't know what it was called.  I think we are feeding him to much chicken.  So I immediately called my mom and said mystery solved.  And yes my idiot hubby decided to skip lunch, drink a few beers and being diabetic, his blood sugar dropped and half way through the store AGAIN, he started having the usual meltdown.  I tried to feed him a banana, but he wouldn't go for it.  I rushed, just to get out of there as usual and forgot the god damn laundry soap.  The most important thing, the number 2 reason I went to the store......DAMN IT, number 1 was to find out what the hell my son was talking about, now I have to go back.  And I have to pay for it, since we have separate accounts and I make him pay for the groceries.  SUCKER.

Well Happy Friday all!!!  have a great weekend!

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Well, Well, Well!

Imagine that.  Bipolar Minion managed to call in 2 days in a row.  HHHMMM, but she's suppose to be in today and tomorrow.  Wow a whole day and a half of work, don't strain yourself working to hard.  Actually I am not that pissed about it because I had to fill in for her and it made my week go by really fast.  And bonus for today, the boss took a random vacation day, wooo hooo.

At least the hubby has been in a good mood over the past couple of days.  I was really getting tired of the whole male PMS thing he had going on.  So last night the evil step bastard showed up at the house and he brought the other kid, the son who just got out of jail (the oldest) OK let me explain real quick.  He moved to his moms a year and a half ago, because he didn't like our rules and his mom lets him do whatever, so he did what every kid with freedom does and fucked off, got in trouble a few times started smoking pot then got busted and off to jail (since he had just turned 18) he went.  Then while in jail, he had the opportunity to go into a rehab for 6 months, get his diploma, and graduate with his class.  But being ignorant and 18 (woo, I'm an adult, I will make my own decisions) decides that he knows how to handle it, I mean he's an adult right?  So he takes the month in rehab and says I will just got to alternative high school.  OK, he gets out of rehab, gets a job within 2 days (his mom got it for him) signed up for school, then calls in sick after 1 day of work, doesn't go to school, misses his weekly piss test, and viola, gets busted for trying to steal booze from Wal-Mart.  Back to jail he goes.  So this 4 month stint in the pokey, I hope has taught him a valuable lesson that he didn't learn the first time.  I hope the fact that his dad didn't talk to him for those 4 months because he didn't want to hear the bullshit he got fed the last time this happened, helped.  Oh and while in jail this was just last weekend mind you, he met up with my LOSER cousin who apparently got arrested for selling drugs, AGAIN!  I, of course, being the concerned relative (NOT) called everybody to see if they knew about this.  I gossiped and spread it around haha.  I must have missed that in the paper last week.  This is strike 3 for you buddy, off to prison you go.  Mommy and Daddy wont be able to bail your ass out of this one.  This is one of the black sheep of the family who cant get his head out of his ass and off the drugs to save his life.  I mean Christ, your parents are RICH, take care of your kids 24-7, let you live in their house for FREE, give you money and a car, and you haven't worked in god knows how many years.  LOSER.  So the dumb ass has a run in with the loser in jail and the loser says how much he and his dad (my great uncle) hate me.  WTF?  What did I ever do to you, well besides talk mad shit about what a LOSER you are.  But hey, the truth hurts, and I guess I am one honest bitch and some people cant handle that.  Still, I really don't think you should be telling my kid that you hate me.  All I have to say is get the straw out of your nose, get a job and take care of your kids, your 44 years old, GROW THE FUCK UP.  I think his parents need a lesson in tough love cause whatever they are doing hasn't worked ( oh god, I really hope they don't fuck up his kids too).  Oh yeah and I asked dumb ass if he has FINALLY learned his lesson from the last bone head crap he pulled, and he said yes, but only time will tell.  I hope so cause he is smart (book, not common sense)  and has the potential to be a good kid.

Well off to work I go :(

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

The week is half over.

Well the last 2 days have went by pretty fast due to the fact that Bipolar minion was on vacation Monday, and she called in sick yesterday.  What a shock.  Lets see if she gets her ass in the office today.  My Bipolar hubby bitched and complained for an hour and a half about work on Monday night after I got home.  I figured I'd better stay off the computer that night so I didn't have to hear it.  Sometimes it's just easier to avoid the fight the bring it on.  I am going to take my ass to the store today, because I am sick of eating chicken.  If I have to eat another piece of chicken I am going to throw up.  Now it's just figuring out what to make.  And I'm out of toothpaste and have to use this disgusting orange shit the Hubby thought would be a good idea to try a while back.  There is just somethings you don't want to brush your teeth with and that would be a slightly mint flavored orange juice.  YUCK!

This Friday my office is having a beach party for everyone up at Tahoe.  I really don't want to go, but it's better then working all day, which is what the alternative is if I don't show up.  The Hubby is working in Tahoe and said he would meet me up there.  The words "Free Drinks & Food" lured him over.  It's suppose to be 100 degree's that day anyways so it will be nice to lay on the beach even if it's with my co-workers.

I just started reading this book called Mennonite in a little black dress.  Yes, I had no idea what the hell a Mennonite was and I had to google it ( i know I'm a retard).  It's a memoir, which I have been really into reading these days.  It's funny and cute and if you want a light read for the beach try it out.  Well happy Wednesday all and I hope your day goes quickly, and mine too.

Monday, July 19, 2010

Long Monday.

Well Monday is almost over.  It's been kind of a long day.  Shit, it was a long weekend too.  The weekend I was so looking forward to ended up with me coming to a serious conclusion.  My Hubby is bipolar.   After the tiff we got into in Friday, I figured it was over, he was just in a mood.  But really how could he be in such a crap mood?  He got half a day off where I'm sure he trolled Craig's list for a good 2 hours looking at boat's, cars, and other various items we don't need (and I'm the one with the computer problem)  and the bastard even got in a nap, and was sleeping on the couch when I got home.  Whatever, this does not in anyway give you the right to be on the rag.

So Saturday, we woke up around 8 (I know I slept in WTF?)  I said I would make breakfast if he went to the store to get some milk.  He said no problem, but could you wash the pan while I'm gone and I will cook.  Sure no problem.  I washed the pan (the one he used to make himself a grilled cheese while I went and ate a ginormous burger while he was pmsing on Friday)  He got home at the very moment I decided to jump on Facebook and check my shit.  Then the multiple personality (evil hubby) reared it's ugly head. and I quot "are you on that fucking computer again?"  Why yes, yes I am and quit you bitching.  Rest of day ruined.  The Relay turned out pretty nice.  I was home by 10, asleep by 11:30 (whoa I no it's late for me)

Sunday, ended up pretty much the same way.  Woke up in good mood turned to shit by mid morning.  I just left, and went to hang out with my mom.  My son went swimming and holy sheep shit, those lessons really paid off.  He can swim!  Then we had a late lunch at el poco loco.  I get home he and the step bastard are cleaning the garage and the driveway is once AGAIN blocked by the piece of crap the ass hat drives.  He seems to be in a fairly good mood at this point as I'm cautiously approaching the garage.  I go in set the boy up with some cartoons and go to my room to watch Practical Magic.  I think I watched at least 4 Sandra Bullock movies this weekend.  He asked if I wanted dinner I said I wasn't hungry but would make whatever he wanted....chicken AGAIN, so I made him a side of mac and cheese, he ate all was well until I decided once again to get on the computer....HOLY FUCK, I got the wrath.  I don't know why he is so f-ing irritated by me getting on the computer?  I get on it maybe like twice a day if that when he's home for like 20 minutes.  I got pissed told him to shut the fuck up, then he pouted to the bedroom where I had the DVR recording something I wanted to watch and OMG I get yelled at for that too.  I said stop it, I don't care, leave me alone.  About an hour later it's like it never happened????  I am perplexed!  I think his tampon might be shoved a little to far up his ass during his time of the month.  I am hoping this mood disorder is not going to rear it's ugly head tonight, but I can pretty much say I'm not that lucky.

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Crap it's hot out.

Well after an excruciating LONG Friday, I came home managed to get into a small tiff with the Hubby, where he decided that he wasn't going to dinner with the family, so I took off with the boy and met up with my Mom to try this new bar and grill that popped up in town.  It really worked out in my favor because I had the biggest stuffed with blue cheese burger and garlic fries you could imagine.  It was F-ing AWESOME.  I was so stuffed and my belly was thanking me over and over again for not feeding it more chicken.  And a little treat for the hubby of horrid breath from the delicious garlic fries when I got home.  Your welcome.  That will teach you to stay home next time!

So it's off to the Relay for Life tonight.  And of course it has to occur on the hottest fucking day of the year here.  I am hoping it will cool off a bit later tonight.  Fingers crossed.  But I am not going to complain to much, it is for a good cause.

I actually slept in this morning.  YAY, I made it to 8.  I did avoid going to bed at 8:30 and made it till 10 last night.  We got a call from his Dad this afternoon, who said he was coming for a visit in 2 weeks.  Man now I actually have to really clean the house and not just spot clean like usual.  Oh well it will be nice to see them anyways.  Well happy weekend all.  

Thursday, July 15, 2010

A few complaint letters

Dear Ex Husband:

I would like the other half of my child support you owe me this month.  I didn't fall for the I get paid every other week routine, so why didn't you call me last week, this time.  I think you need to remember that we are Facebook friends and therefore I know everything you do.  Like for example I don't think it's appropriate to go out and buy a new Iphone, then brag about it when you know you owe me money.

Dear Sharon Angle: (political figure running for Harry Reid's seat, I'm sure you've heard of him at least)

I am sick of your ads, please retract them at once.  I do not enjoy listening to the "God Fathery" music during my morning coffee.  It starts making me paranoid that I'm gonna get "whacked" at any moment.  And for this I will NOT vote for you in the future.

Dear Costco:

For the love of GOD, would you please open a fucking express line.  I do not enjoy standing in line for an hour when I have 2 items and you only have 2 checkouts open, at the busiest time of day.

Dear Wal-Mart:

Please, oh PLEASE would it be to much trouble for your store to stock the shelves at night?  It's bad enough I have to dodge a million people on Saturday but then making a 2 cart isle into 1 by blocking half the isle with your giant cart of CRAP in the middle of the day, well just isn't effective.  I thought this is why your store was open 24 hours.

Dear People that Call the Firm:

No, I don't give a rat's ass that you got fired, nor do any of the Attorney's here.  You were probably fired for a good reason, get over it.  Nor do I care that so and so owes you money so let's cut the explanation down to 1 minute or less.  Yes, I will take your name and number and pretend to pass it along just to make you feel better, but in reality I'm not, So stop calling, unless you have a legitimate reason for needing an attorney.

Dear Radio Station:

Why is it whenever I get in my car, which is a lot, Nickleback is always on?  I am really sick of hearing Sunday Afternoon.  I used to kind of like them, but I dont now.  Please fix it or I'm going to have to find a Nickleback free station.

Last but not Least

Dear Evil Step Bastard:

I dont think it's wise to purchase a dirt bike.  You still owe me $30.00 this month for the Internet connection on the I phone you HAD to have that I refuse to pay for, but your Dad makes me, since you have a job and need to learn how to pay bills for when I kick you out of my house when your 18 because I no longer am required by law to take care of you.  And you are the most accident prone person I have ever met in my life, and might hurt yourself so bad that you cant work, and then be sitting on my couch annoying the crap out of me 24 7.  And we both really dont want or need that.  So how about instead you just save up your money (minus the 30 you owe me every month) and buy yourself what every teenager dreams of......a better car.  This way it's win win for everyone.  You dont need to borrow and break my car when you need to travel out of this city, and make sure it has enough room for your stuff when you move out.  Please take my ideas into consideration because the future is not far behind.

I feel better, sorry for the ranting, thank you for listening.

Tick Tick Tick......

Last night wasn't as bad as I figured it would be.  I pulled up to the house and he had the car we don't use (the Suburban, it's way to big, a gas hog, and I only drive it when it snows, oh yeah and to pull the boat to the lake) out and rinsing it off.  Anyways he says not one damn word to me so I go in the house and jump on the computer (cause I'm not on it enough at work) Then Step bastard comes in and says wheres my Dad?  I don't know, he was just out there.  So about 15 minutes roll by the Hubby comes in.  He actually went to the store. I couldn't believe it.  He did however buy more chicken....hhuuuhh 2 nights in a row.  I wonder whats on the menu for tonight seeing as how I only have CHICKEN.

2 more days then the weekend, I cant wait.  One more episode on the fourth True blood disk to go and one more night at the gym tonight.  Then sweet weekend freedom.

So this is what my horoscope said in the paper today.  Sorry for the crappy picture my camera phone blows.  But I thought it was kind of funny and fitting.  If you cant read it, it says "Find reasons to compliment your co-worker than to complain and you'll discover how to get along with him or her"  HAHAHA, I dont think so.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

What a crazy ass day!

I have been so freaking busy today.  But I am not complaining because my day has gone by really fast, and thank god for that.  My day started off with a run over to Yerington for work.  3 1/2 blissful hours in my car with my music blaring there and back.  It was funny because I kind of made the trip for nothing, seeing as how the secretary that sent me didn't have all the proper documents attached to her recording, but hey it's better then being stuck in the office.  Then my idiot Husband called me like 10 times today, and it wasn't a "hi, how are you, are you having a good day" conversation, it was mostly him yelling at me for something he did.  And you know what, I think I am going to stick to texting him only and not answering when he calls.  This is the reason, not that he's yelling, cause he's always flustered about something, but because when he pauses, like when I think it's my turn to speak now, he starts talking the minute I start to respond and then gets pissed at me for "interrupting him"  Hey fuck you pal, if you don't like it stop CALLING ME!  Anyways I did manage to get Bipolar Minions unemployed boyfriend a job as a laborer with my husband.  Good luck to him cause he's a DICK to work for I guess.  The first call this morning was to see if I knew anyone who wanted a job, because the laborer from yesterday didn't even last  24 hours, so I suggested Bipolars out of work boyfriend whose unemployment just ran out.  I know I a nice person (eye roll)

So seeing as how he in in such a wonderful mood today, I so look forward to going home tonight (cant you just hear all the sarcasm pouring from my sentence)  I have no idea what to make for dinner tonight.  We had chicken last night and all I have is more chicken....hhhuuuhhh, maybe burgers, or maybe he will be in the mood to run to the store and find something, HA yeah right.  Cereal it is!

So my daughter called me today to tell me how her vacation with Grandma is going.  2 whole weeks of an almost empty house.  I would have sent the boy too, but when those two get together it's like oil and water and I can barley stand them, so I don't want to make it difficult for her.  Anyways she went to Disneyland this morning, which for some reason didn't seem to be that excited about.  Then she tells me that they stopped at Wal-Greens for something and she saw "Hobo's" she tells me "they were just laying around it was kind of weird"  "Then we drove off and I saw more Hobo's digging through the trash"  The word "Hobo" could have only come from my Grandma, and I know we live in a somewhat small town and she's never experienced bums, but it was funny to hear her say it that way.  What are we like in the 1930's or something?  So anyways they are off to Knotts Berry Farm Tomorrow and then god knows what else. 

This weekend the family is doing the Relay for Life walk.  It's usually a fun night.  Your suppose to walk all night long, but I just stay as long as I can stay awake.  They light luminaries for all the survivors and loved ones lost.  My Dad passed away from cancer 4 years ago, my 14 year old cousin is in remission, and my 26 year old sis in law is going through treatment.  So this is important to me.  And it's a great way to honor those living and lost.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010


So Sunday after my Hubby got home from working, well he didn't work, just went to look at a job up in Tahoe, poor baby (it's like 20 degrees coller there then here in the valley), and then had lunch with his co-workers at one of the beaches.  He was complaining that his back was hurting from earlier in the day, let me explain, when we went to breakfast he got out of the truck and opened the door for the boy to get out and somehow twisted wrong and instant hurt back.  I'm thinking if his truck wasn't 12 feet off the ground, he wasn't 40, and out of shape these things might not happen to him as much.  But what do I know I'm a spring chicken, hahaha.  So anyways I was in my room reading my book because the boy wouldn't let me have the living room, (he was watching I Carly and Sponge Bob) so the Hubby laid down with me after having a small seizure when he went to the garage and found his jump box that the evil step bastard borrowed on Saturday when he took the quads out, broken.  Well that's what you get for letting the kid take YOUR things that are not cheap, when you know EVERYTHING he touches BREAKS.  For example the quad, "um I accidentally rolled it"  $900.00 worth of damage.  My car "it worked fine on the way to Reno and home"  Really cause it keeps dying the minute I start it, now the jump box "I don't know what happened it was all in one piece when I put it back in the garage"  but he never learns his lesson and things continue to break. In an attempt to be a good wife I offered to rub his back for him, so after a few minutes he said try popping it for me.  So I pushed down as hard as I could to no avail.  I said why don't you lay on the floor and I will jump on it.  That seemed to work, he says I need to get on my inversion table (which is buried in the garage somewhere) then light bulb!  I said hang on I have something for you to try, so I grabbed my yoga ball and told him to roll back on it and stretch his back out.  OMG!  I thought the thing was going to blow under his weight.  Thank god it didn't, otherwise somebody would be hauling his ass to the store to buy me another.  He said it only helped a bit and I did what I could, finally gave up and said "take a pill" and back to my room I went.  So I flipped on the TV to drown out all the huffing and puffing next to me and got sucked into a whale wars marathon,  FUCK, now I'm hooked, I swear how do I get sucked into these things?  Oh I know, there is nothing on in the summer.  Even my DVR is going into shock with nothing to record. All I got these days are the Real Housewives of NJ and Bethany Getting Married, oh yes and my beloved Army Wives, and it was another 8:30 night for me

Monday was pretty mellow.  I started reading Eat, Love, Pray.  So far it's been pretty good, I don't like the fact that the words are in SMALL print, maybe I should check out the large print version.  I really need some glasses but is avoiding the eye doctor like the plague.  So I hold the book closer to my face and that seems to help. I was a little apprehensive about reading this book because it's now a movie and I loves me movies, and always seem to ruin the movie by reading the book.  As everyone knows the book is always better.  But I decided to give it a whirl anyways.  My Hubby made dinner last night, sausage and peppers over pasta so that was awesome not having to cook.  And tonight it's back to the gym.  I have skipped the last couple weeks because of the holiday and all, but now its back to work.  Happy Tuesday.

Sunday, July 11, 2010

ahhh the weekend!

So in an attempt to sleep in yesterday we shut the windows, blinds, and what ever else we could close down to TRY to sleep in.  HA, fat chance, the idiot left the bathroom window open to draw the swamp cooler air into our room so it wasn't sweltering while we slept.  For those of you unaware of what a swamp cooler is.......its a cheap air conditioner that uses water and a fan, for us west coasters in the dry climate.   Anyhooo, those god damn birds started chirping a 5:30 in the morning, are you kidding me, if I only had a BB gun......
So I got up and made the coffee.  It didn't help that I also fell a sleep at 8:30 on Friday night, I know, I know, I must stop all the partying.

So after a day of doing absolutely NOTHING, we, or he rather, decided we needed to go shoe shopping for him.  YAY, more shopping with you, cant wait.  After 3 stores we finally ended up at Wal-Mart where he tried on, and bought 4 pairs of shoes.  (me shaking my head)  That was 2 hours of my life I'll never get back, but the promise of dinner afterwards lured me away from my comfy couch and book.  Dinner was pretty good.  We met my mom, brother, sis in law, and nephew.  OK I am going to bitch a little about my sis in law aka Mrs. Granola.  My nephew is 8 1/2 months old, and cute and adorable rolly polly baby, his mother is a first time Mom, god help me.  This chick is the type that trys to make her own baby food, tastes all the baby food she gives him (um can you say fucking gross) and still has him attached to her boob, but just at night because she needs the bonding time with him.  Give it about a year and you will be doing anything you can to get away from your kid.  So sorry back to the point.  I have never seen this kid eat anything but squash, applesauce, and those Gerber puff thingies.  My Mom in an attempt to get her to actually feed the kids while we were out bought her some baby food, because he was trying to grab anything he could off the table (it was sad really)  So she opens a jar last night takes 4 scoops (with the baby spoon) and puts it on a lid and starts to feed him.  ?????, OK whats with the make shift plate?  She says, well he doesn't eat that much, huh?  I say, I look at my mom, who's rolling her eyes at me like don't start, but cant keep my mouth shut, so I say REALLY, he should be eating a whole jar by now right?  8 months old, I have 2 kids, I think, I hope I can remember.  She says well he just doesn't,  hhmmm OK whatever, so I watch, he's all excited.....arms flailing around like he's trying to fly away (did I mention how cute he is) she feeds him, it's all gone and he's whining for more.  She gets the jar back out, scoops out 2 more globs and gives him the rest.  Uh, baby still crying, I think he wants more, but one question first why don't you just feed him out of the jar instead of putting it on a Tupperware lid?  Because he doesn't eat it all she says (kind of bitchy by the way)  I said that's why it has a lid right?  So you can PUT IT BACK ON, if he doesn't finish it.  My brother turns and says because of the germs.....WTF did you just say? GERMS?  What his own?  My mother who is shaking her head and rolling her eyes more at me in a quiet attempt to shut me up, I guess because she had to drive home with them....hahaha.  So our food comes, baby still hungry and she starts giving him the puff things.  OK so you wont give him a whole jar of squash (healthy, nutrient) but she will feed him handfuls of those puffs (snack food, not dinner)  And I'm the crazy one.
So today my hubby went to work for a few hours (oh thank god) we went to breakfast this morning to a place I have always wanted to try, but in the 20 some odd years I have lived here, never have.  Well the food was good, the service sucked, she forgot the boy's french toast, dropped my hubby's sausage on the floor, then he bitched about it, so I'm sure he ate the floor sausage....hahaha, and they didn't take debit cards.  OK, WHOA, you don't take debit, she says no cash or check only.  CHECK?  Dude have I been time warped back to the 80's?  Nobody takes checks!  So Hubby had to run across the street to the bank, cause of course we don't have cash and we live in the 2000's and dont need to carry cash at all times, and I am NOT writing a fucking check. Pay and he tips her like 5 bucks.  I thought he should have left 2 maybe 3 at the most, but then again I decided not to bring up the floor sausage to him so we could just leave.  Well that's one place I guess I wont be eating at again. 

Well hope everyone has had a nice weekend.  Back to work and lets see what the Minions have in store for me this week!

Friday, July 9, 2010

Is trying to have a better day.

Well after yelling at half the office yesterday, I'm going to try to have a better day today.  Seeing as how it's Friday and all. 

I really cant believe how freaking STUPID some people can be.  After busting my ass getting these heavy ass book shelves up the stairs (it wouldn't fit in the elevator) shimming them so they would sit properly against the wall, (that took 20 minutes just trying to get them positioned right) and dealing with these god awful shelves that I had to beat on and tweak with a screwdriver just to get the fucking things off the clips to adjust the shelf (while baldy(asshole attorney) was yelling I was making to much noise and people were on the phone, yeah fuck you pal, you think you can do this any quieter be my guest).  I tell Blondie that I will come and trim the cardboard shims once she puts everything on the bookcases, so that way they wont show.  Menopausal minion comes down about half hour later and says giant head (the I think I'm better then everyone attorney) is complaining in Blondie's ( his secretary) office that the cardboard looks tacky.  I get up, march my pissed ass up there and say BLONDIE I told you I would trim the damn cardboard when you got everything back on the shelves.  Then I notice on the one case that the shim I spent 20 minutes trying to get right is pushed back, not even in the right position (pretty much half way underneath the case).  I turned to her and said who moved this?  Blondie trying to back pedal stutters and says uh I uh nobody moved it.  Do you think I'm dumb?  Does my hair look blond to you? (no offense to you blonds out there) SOMEONE MOVED THIS!  And now the damn bookcase is wobbly.  So I trimmed the other one, said see now you cant even see it, and it's nice and stable, and be careful pulling shit off that other case cause it's going to fall over and walked away.  Came down bitched to my computer genie a little, grabbed my purse and left.  I Left early for everyone's well being, because someone might have gotten themselves chocked.

I also had some words with Bipolar Minion, yes because I was still mad about the call in.  It might have involved the words Bitch and Slap, but that's all I'll say.

Then I get home after having to take a detour because they closed the street to get to camp, (why, why does this shit happen to me)  I dropped off my son before picking up my daughter and I get the third degree from the insecure bastard I reside with.  "Why did you go out of your way to come home to drop him off and then have to go get the girl, it seems kind of weird that you wouldn't just go pick her up then come home"  because I knew you were home dumb shit and asked the boy if he wanted to go with me or come home, he chose home.  "Well how did you know I was even home?"  Because, I saw the guy you get a ride with at the gas station.  Anymore questions?  Would you like to water board me too, to make sure I'm telling the truth.....FUCK!  And that was not the end of it either, he called this morning to tell me "you didn't say you were at the Iraqi shack that's way out of the way from camp so you went there, drove all the way on the other side of town then came back dropped off the boy and then went to the other side of town to pick up the girl.  YES, YES I DID.  Because I had to buy smokes and that's the cheapest place to get them.  And that folks brought up the whole cigarette debate.  I'm sure I will have to deal with the smoking nazi when I get home tonight.....YAY me!

I'm going to have a good day, I'm going to have a good day, I'm going to have a good day, I'm going to have a good day.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Are you F-ing Kidding me?

So Bipolar Minion showed up bright and early this morning to set up the conference room since I have to fill in for the receptionist who is at an appt. and since I cant be in 2 places at once I told her to get her ass in early so she could do it on Tuesday.  Wow, that day off she had yesterday really put her in an excellent mood this morning.  She is already bitching first thing.  I am really trying to avoid her so I don't rip her head off for yesterdays little stunt cause I'm still PISSED.  This ought to put Menopausal Minion in a great mood, considering she hates her.  God, I cant win. 

So last night we did the dreaded grocery shopping, and you all know how much I LOVE to shop with my Hubby.  It always starts off fine then half way through the store he gets pissy.  I am NOT going next time.  Between him and the boy I officially hate shopping.  But on the upside I did manage to save $90.00 with my coupons and club card, thank you mega meat sale.  Then it was home to eat pizza rolls (cause that was the quickest thing we could eat) and emerge myself in another fantastic episode of the second season of True Blood, in my bed.  Did I tell you how much I love that's seriously like B porn.....Fantastic.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

I'm trying to be calm!

Hhhhmmmm, I am really trying to keep my composure here.  But I feel my blood pressure creeping up on me.  I just got an email from the receptionist that Bipolar minion wont be in today due to her kid being sick.  What's wrong with this you ask?  I'll fucking tell you.  The problem is that her unemployed boyfriend is home, why does that require you to also stay home?  Does it require two parents to watch a sick kid?  (I really doubt she's even sick)  the answer if NO.  I'm sure she thought since she is out of sick time and probably vacation as well that she would pull the sick kid card, nope, not buying it, not as dumb as I look.  This will put me in a bad mood for the rest of the day now.....Thanks, and I'm sure everyone else will thank you when I yell at them today.  And I will make sure they no it's YOUR FAULT.

Tuesday, July 6, 2010


OK let's see lots to tell about my 6 day camping excursion. Wednesday I managed to drag my ass off the couch long enough to drop off the house key to my Grandma, load the trailer with food and clothes, and pick up my son from camp. Then it was back to the couch till the Hubby got home. I don't think I've recovered still, from staying up to watch that movie. In my mind I still feel 16-17 when I could stay up half the night and then get up and go to school the next day. It really sucks getting old. It's been a week and I'm still not caught up on sleep.
So we finally made it to the lake, got everything set up then the Hubby left so he could go to work the next morning. I read a little until my eyes started crossing and thought I should call it an early night. The next morning was hot and nice. I sat it total peace on the beach in my chair with my book. I couldn't have asked for a better vacation (for the moment). My son and I swam, played cards and played ball with the dog.  All in all it was a great day.  Then people started showing up.  The second night was good, our friends who came out with a fully stocked bar and a Margarita machine in her trailer kept trying to feed us shots.  I had 4, hey I'm on vacation.  We had fun watching our other friend get so drunk I think she ping ponged off the tiki torches to get to her trailer then missed the step and fell in flat on her face......fucking priceless. 

The next day the giant group showed up, and we had a fun filled day of boating, swimming and lounging around.  Our one friend who is in his 40's and recently divorced has found himself a young piece of ass, which is fine...whatever, but she's a huge pot head.  I swear to god she sat on the beach literally baked all day.  Seeing as their trailer was parked in front of ours, you could smell it every 5 minutes.  I swear her and her friend were in there every half hour toking it up.  We were all like AGAIN?  One go round for me, I would be a sleep the rest of the day, fuck that.

On Sunday My Hubby decided to wake board.  I had some apprehension towards this, considering the last time he tried to water ski we ended up in the ER thinking he had an aneurysm (don't worry it turned out to be high blood pressure brought on by the enormous amount of pressure it took to get his fat ass out of the water).  Or like the time before that pulled a muscle in his back so bad he was off of work for a week.  I have to put my foot down every time he says I think I'm going to try and water ski today.  I bring up the events of the past and try to detour any attempt.  Hey he doesn't get paid when he's off.  So anyways I said fine, but if you hurt yourself, you can scratch this off the list of to do's.  So first try he got up, swished back and fourth (I don't know the correct terminology, I just ride in the boat) let go and that was it.  OK great no aches and pains we are all good!  Until a little later and a few drinks in him and he's in his 20's again.  He tells me he's going wake boarding again.  Whatever I'm staying here this time.  So I'm watching, he's ready, there he goes and there he goes, face first into the water.  Tries 2-4 pretty much ended up the same way.  Try 5 hes up and off, this is where they went behind the cove we were in and I couldn't see him.  About an hour later they came back and guess what, he crashed so hard he thought his eyes shot out his ass, and pulled a muscle.  HHHMMM  Scratch that off the list.........CHECK!

Well all in all it was a good trip minus the migraine I suffered on Saturday, the period that started on Sunday, and my Hubby giving himself a lake enema Sunday night.  We pretty much came through unscathed.  Now it's back to work....ugh, and lots of laundry, double ugh!